its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
