It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
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today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
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Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
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