How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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