Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
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