She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
He? As in you personified your dick?
So apparently I’m into choking now
Randomize
