If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
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