u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
im about as happy as oj after his trial
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
