i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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