I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
