Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
