I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
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