i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.