Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(+44): View more from England

You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked

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(425): View more from Washington

There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.

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(703): View more from Virginia

I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries

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(778): View more from British Columbia

You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.

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27 Parents Confess Shocking Secrets Their Kids Don’t Know
Read it at the TFLN blog
(402): View more from Nebraska

Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted

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(678): View more from Georgia

Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.

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(760): View more from California

I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.

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(979): View more from Texas

I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.

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