Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
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I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
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She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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