Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
