You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
