Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
Holy sore nipples Batman
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
