So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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