Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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