it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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