the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
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