omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
the night ended with taco bell and tears
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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