That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
her vagine was all disorganized.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
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We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
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I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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