i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Randomize
