I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
You're a waste of cheezeits
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
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