Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I use my feet as sexual weapons
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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