BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Randomize
