I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
