i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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