Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
She and I had some intense sexual tension earlier when she dumped a package of apple straws all over my body.
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