This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Randomize