I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
