I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
