I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
My Sexting was not on an AP level
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I smell like Dick and happiness
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
