i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Randomize
