i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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