Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Randomize
