hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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