You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no you cant smoke seaweed
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
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