Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(281): View more from Texas

3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.

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(281): 3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals. http://tfl.nu/21ij

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(323): View more from California

are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions

(310): View more from California

i wish

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(323): are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions (310): i wish http://tfl.nu/mg2v

Replies (6) Good night (700) Bad night (2690)
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(407): View more from Florida

My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.

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(407): My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options. http://tfl.nu/3za2

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(660): View more from Missouri

THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.

(816): View more from Missouri

..So we should take it off Youtube?

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(660): THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you. (816): ..So we should take it off Youtube? http://tfl.nu/93os

Replies (28) Good night (10950) Bad night (1548)
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(917): View more from New York City

You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking

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(917): You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking http://tfl.nu/a0v5

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.

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(610): He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember. http://tfl.nu/2y89

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(813): View more from Florida

I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious

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(813): I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious http://tfl.nu/g6os

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?

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(724): Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin? http://tfl.nu/jzs7

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(515): View more from Iowa

At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.

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(515): At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers. http://tfl.nu/s4no

Replies (7) Good night (1198) Bad night (613)
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(860): View more from Connecticut

Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween

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(860): Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween http://tfl.nu/izhm

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(973): View more from New Jersey

I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league

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(973): I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league http://tfl.nu/mvb2

Replies (2) Good night (1135) Bad night (222)
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(585): View more from New York

He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants

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(585): He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants http://tfl.nu/sshj

Replies (7) Good night (521) Bad night (317)
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(708): View more from Illinois

I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.

(708): View more from Illinois

And it tastes incredible.

(708): View more from Illinois

And I have chest pains.

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(708): I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee. (708): And it tastes incredible. (708): And I have chest pains. http://tfl.nu/iw1m

Replies (6) Good night (1022) Bad night (320)
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(712): View more from Iowa

How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?

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(712): How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober? http://tfl.nu/4zoo

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(317): View more from Indiana

it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.

(1-317): View more from Indiana

On my way

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(317): it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone. (1-317): On my way http://tfl.nu/kjt4

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