you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
Randomize
