u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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