the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
