your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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