we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Ladies don't puke and tell
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
