I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Randomize
