I need help removing her.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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