Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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