the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize