Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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