Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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