Texts From Last Night

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  (224): View more from Illinois

  his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.

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  (224): his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this. http://tfl.nu/41n8
  Replies (55) Good night (1319) Bad night (5207)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants

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  (512): I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants http://tfl.nu/4e8k
  Replies (61) Good night (910) Bad night (8518)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.

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  (401): I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy. http://tfl.nu/4ar4
  Replies (38) Good night (5946) Bad night (1252)
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  (936): View more from Texas

  Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.

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  (936): Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow. http://tfl.nu/amif
  Replies (15) Good night (7467) Bad night (977)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?

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  (701): Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire? http://tfl.nu/pmju
  Replies (3) Good night (1472) Bad night (2007)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.

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  (313): I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6. http://tfl.nu/0yci
  Replies (13) Good night (1785) Bad night (2165)
• Favorite

  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.

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  (580): So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep. http://tfl.nu/hhhj
  Replies (3) Good night (849) Bad night (1994)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship

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  (717): Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship http://tfl.nu/uea0
  Replies (1) Good night (473) Bad night (1103)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.

  (1-303): View more from Colorado

  God you're perfect.

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.

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  (303): Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal. (1-303): God you're perfect. (303): I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier. http://tfl.nu/2wzm
  Replies (5) Good night (2061) Bad night (519)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement

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  (330): I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement http://tfl.nu/yzu8
  Replies (1) Good night (521) Bad night (870)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."

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  (586): The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON." http://tfl.nu/rycj
  Replies (5) Good night (1188) Bad night (360)
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  (802): View more from Vermont

  I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty

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  (802): I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty http://tfl.nu/5ayd
  Replies (3) Good night (713) Bad night (277)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE

  (585): View more from New York

  AND NO VODKA

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  (585): We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE (585): AND NO VODKA http://tfl.nu/16y5
  Replies (3) Good night (298) Bad night (592)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.

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  (785): I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright. http://tfl.nu/s51t
  Replies (0) Good night (408) Bad night (315)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.

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  (773): she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho. http://tfl.nu/fmz4
  Replies (0) Good night (479) Bad night (213)

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