After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
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When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
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His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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